In a blazing round of ‘Who’s on First’, Tennessee proclaims its Presidential Primary to start RIGHT NOW

South Carolina just announced that their Presidential primary is going to be moved up to January 19th, ‘leapfrogging ahead of the Florida primary and setting the stage for more states to move up their contests’. I’m boycotting the debates because this is 2007 and the election is FREAKING NEXT YEAR, but if this trend [...]

From the top

When choices range from mouth to bend-o,
I prefer my torso-scopics, endo,
the coffee-less foodless short-term fast,
beats by miles the colon-cleansing repast,
but, the major concern is the photographic yield,
Renderings disclose my stomach healed,
Thanks be to my doctors and nurses
Right now, I don’t mind their fattened purses.