Next contestant – Mr. Steve Gill, or, nodding off during the Spelling Bee..

I was attempting to watch the National Spelling Bell last night, but I made the mistake of approaching the viewing in a recumbent position. The sleep elves go into action when I assume this position, therefore what I actually see on TV and what I think I see are occasionally at odds.

Our next contestant is from Nashville, Tennessee…Steve Gill (applause from the right side of the auditorium).

Mr. Gill, your word is ‘thought’.

From Mr. Gill’s demeanor, it’s clear that the word is not one with which he has familiarity.

Uh, are there alternate pronunciations?

Only one, sir,…thought

What is the definition?

The act, or process, of thinking.

Contestant kneads his brow…looking rather lost.

Could you use it in a sentence?

We obviously thought that most people would know this word.

What’s the derivation of the word?

It’s from Middle English.

Is that below New England?

No’s derived from a time around the 15th century.

Can you give me the spelling?

No sir, none of the other contestants get the spellings of their words. It would be hardly fair.

Is this bigger than a bread box?

Hard to say, sir, but in your case, not likely.

Have I ever had or possessed one?

The evidence is rather sketchy on that sir.

What’s it mean again?

The act of thinking.


Your time is nearly up, sir…do you have a spelling for us?

This is really not fair..obviously the other contestants have these things and I don’t.

Do you have a spelling?

I HATE these foreign words. T H O T. THOT.


Mr Gill trudges over to this parents, muttering something about all these damn foreigners…

I think I dozed off about this time.



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2 responses to “Next contestant – Mr. Steve Gill, or, nodding off during the Spelling Bee..

  1. Standing ovation, my friend. Hysterical

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