Bud Selig is a dipwad

For those of you who don’t know (and maybe don’t care), Selig is the commissioner of baseball. He’s been presiding over my favorite sport for many years, including the grand steroid era, when Barry Bonds hat-size grew and Mark McGwire’s arms took on the appearance of Popeye post-spinach. Home run records were obliterated. The fact that the players and NOT the ball that was juiced was the worst-kept secret in baseball. What did Bud do? Nothing. He proffered a tepid drug policy which captured the cannabis intake, but did little to curb the appetite for bigger and longer and deeper home runs.

Of course attendance grew, and the summer of 98′ when both Sammy Sosa and Mark McGwire hit prodigious home runs at an unheard of rate, Bud was front and center, shining like the gleaming used-car saleman that he was in his former life.

But a few years ago when newspapers and baseball beat writers began to air their suspicion, and even the President mentioned the problem in his State of the Union address, old Bud began to sing a different tune: ‘We have a problem’ and then proceeded to nothing about it until congress held hearings and then bygoshgollygumgee, we suddenly had a steroid policy. So far the policy has netted about a dozen major leaguers, mostly Hispanic.
So, here we are in 2007. Barry Bonds is about to break Hank Aaron’s all-time home run record. By my estimation, about 200 of those home runs are a result of the juice. Based on his normal pre-steriod years, he was averaging about 40 home runs a year. Barry is the first player in major league history to actually IMPROVE in his late 30s, early 40s. Pretty much everybody outside of Barry’s immediate family believes he was juiced round the turn of the century.

Normally when a milestone as big as the all-time home run record is broken, the commissioner makes an attempt to be in attendance. But, milquetoast Bud is still wavering. If he doesn’t attend because he thinks Barry is guilty, then he needs to do something about Barry. If he doesn’t believe Barry is guilty, then he needs to attend. But, Bud wants it both ways…he lavished in the luxury years of the steroids and then acted serious when the heat was on.

Take a stand Bud, and let’s get this right.

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Filed under baseball, evil greedy bastards

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