August is a big month for us..or, Thank you Elvis

Thirty years ago a quiet young woman married a long-haired young man who wasn’t quite so quiet. Both the bride and the groom wanted a small quiet wedding. They managed to obtain the beautiful front room of a brownstone in the Flatbush section of Brooklyn. They only invited family and close close friends. Distance from home made the feat simpler. A friend helped us write the vows, and it was over in a flash. We had poppyseed cake (our favorite) and some chocolate cake and a bunch of stuff to drink, and then we borrowed a car and drove over into Manhattan for a couple of nights in the big city.

The date was actually the 14th (of August). While our short honeymoon was winding down (hey, we had no money) two days after the wedding, Elvis chose his time do die. I don’t know if he REALLY chose the time, but his death certainly overshadowed our wedding, at least in the Daily News. We drove the car back to a friend’s house, and took the subway home to our apartment in the not-so-wonderful neighborhood of East New York. It really wasn’t safe, but we didn’t care, because the friendship that evolved into love (and lust) helped us belie the fact that we lived in a scary neighborhood in a small apartment prone to break-ins. We were social workers. We came to save the world, but I think we mainly saved each other.

We lived in Brooklyn for five years and managed to have our first child. I had a cheap stereo (really really cheap so that it would not be stolen) and Lynn gave me Talking Heads 77 for our first Christmas. I still know every groove. Elvis remained dead, except in the pages of the Weekly World News. Thanks to his timing, I have a built-in reminder of my anniversary date every year. I really don’t need the reminder, but it does evoke a special day in a wonderful Brownstone in the Flatbush area of Brooklyn.

We are celebrating off and on this month. We began by having a fabulous dinner at the Canyon Cafe up on Lookout Mountain on the Georgia end. The off and on part is due to work and lack of leave (I had to take a lot of medical leave this year), but I think it is symbolic of something more. Marriage, or at least prolonged marriage, is damn hard work. Sometimes you want to leave the joint and drive into ‘Bolivian’ (as Mike Tyson once said) or maybe into the arms of someone else. Sometimes you just feel so damn lucky the world transcends magic, but one thematic argument later, you wanna jump off the roof. You don’t. You stay. You work and argue and love and work some more. Thirty years…the dividends compound.



Filed under friends and family, journey

22 responses to “August is a big month for us..or, Thank you Elvis

  1. Happy Anniversary to both of you.
    And, of course I was thrilled with the WWN comment 🙂

  2. I’m all teary eyed now, Hutch. There are no words to express how much I respect you and your beautiful wife for truly showing us what the word “commitment” means.

    Happy Anniversary!

  3. bridgett

    You said it. You’re both living it. We honor it. Happy Anniversary month.

  4. I can only pray for such.


  5. Luanne

    Ah Elvis – in 1977 in Mississippi, people were actually driving to Graceland to mourn. Luckily they managed to put aside their grief for our wedding on August 20. Your thoughts were right on target for this 30-year vet – Congratulations and best wishes for many more!

  6. Elvis died on my 13th birthday, so I truly understand the yearly reminder thing.

    Happy Anniversary! The two of you are the cutest couple. (Ain’t it cool that someone would say that 30 years in?)

  7. Congrats to y’all on the anniversary.

    Y’all make it look easy, which only shows me how hard you two are working at it. But from what I can see, you’re getting it right.

  8. Pingback: Music City Bloggers » Blog Archive » 30 Years and Counting….

  9. You and your lovely wife are fab people and I’m glad I know the both of you. Happy anniversary!

  10. Friends of Light Lunch

    Happy anniversary! Wonderful post~

  11. What a wonderful testimony to a beautiful couple! Like Michael said, “y’all make it look easy”.

    Relish in you month-long revelry.

    Happy anniversary from me. The German asked me to pass along Alles Gute Zum Hochzeilstag from him

  12. Congratulations to the both of you! I admit to tearing up at such a sweet tribute. I hope you two have many, many more anniversaries!

  13. Congrats on 30, and to 30 more!

  14. Margaret

    Congratulations! I love you and Lynn and pray for many years ahead full of deeply satisfying love. You have been truly blessed in Lynn, John, and I know you’re doing your best to be a blessing to her. (from the one who always – according to you – takes her side)

  15. Happy anniversary! We’re only 23 short of you this year! 😀

  16. nice post. happy anniversary!

  17. >>You work and argue and love and work some more<<<

    Marriage in a nutshell.

    Happy Anniversary.

  18. I am so happy for both of you. I only met Lynn one time, and I regret we never got together again. She is such a lovely woman. And, she has a good man.

    Congrats to both of you. God willing, you’ll have at least 30 more.

  19. Pingback: It was thirty years ago today… « Salem’s Lots

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