Category Archives: heh heh

Oh dear lord, the liberals are coming, the liberals are coming..

Scene: A seemingly forsaken warehouse somewhere in the south side of Chicago. We see stairs leading to the basement..if we look closer, we see a sign – ‘Terrorists Entrance’. We peek inside…around a red-stained round table sit a dazed looking Barack Obama, William Ayers, the ghosts of Huey Newton and Harvey Milk sharing a bench with Angela Davis, along with a lot of other shadowy sketchy-looking leftist-types all wearing ‘Che’ t-shirts sipping on some concoction that appears to have beets as the key component…listen closely:

Obama, in a trance-like whisper: ‘Yes, William Ayers, the word ‘Allah’ will be substituted for ‘God’ on every government building and all coinage’.

Harvey Milk pours forth: ‘And, Barack, don’t forget the boy scouts..you’ve GOT to demand gay scout masters..in fact, that should be mandatory, and the military…not just don’t ask, don’t tell, but the military should be 100% gay. The fighting elan factor would never be higher..the comraderie, the themed uniforms, the life in the trenches…you’ve GOT to do this Obama’.

Obama nods his head.

Angela Davis rises, fist upraised and her heart uplifted…’and abortion..not just on demand, but as a demand, for all women who want to raise their children as Christians or as heterosexuals’.

‘Yes, Sister Davis’, Obama says without blinking, with a thousand yard stare seen more commonly in the nearby shooting galleries.

‘And Brother Obama’, a wispy Huey intones, ‘only atheists on the Supreme Court, and they really should be Muslim atheists, if you know what I mean’.

Angela raises her fist towards Huey and in a sharp voice barks, ‘They need to be female lesbian Muslim atheists Huey’, while Harvey milks his beet frappe, nodding to a Joy Division tune only he can hear.

‘Back to the Boy Scouts’, a leering Ayers rang out ..’we should only allow DWARVES instead of boys..boys should be in re-education school learning why white males are the lowest form of carbon-based life in existence’

‘Sing on bother William’, a surprisingly spry Newton spat out a fig and spoke some more, ‘And those Bush-Cheney bastards..let’s break into the archives, find all the things they did wrong and send em’ to Folsom prison. Maybe one of our pyrotechnical friends will conjure up a burning bush, if you know what i mean’.

Chuckles all around the table.

Ayers scratched his head and exclaimed..’oh yeah, those dwarf fake boy scouts..they’ve gotta be GAY’!!

Amens abounded, bouncing off of the posters lining the wall – Mao, Fidel, Ted Kennedy, Stokely Carmichael, and Dave Kopay.

‘What about gay marriage?’, chimed in Milk. ‘Don’t you think that people should sign some kind of document stating that they have had at least a gay thought before they are allowed to be married’?

‘Marriage, smcarriage’ snorted Angela D. In a free and open society, the ashes of chattle-dom should be buried along with Christian broadcasting, and Christian schools’!

Ayers aired out a hearty ‘Amen’, sista D’, before glancing over at Obama to make sure he was still under hypnosis. ‘We better hurry up, we gotta get Brother Barack over to Grant Park for the biggest speech of his life’.

‘You’re right’, Harvey Milk-ed, but one more thing: ‘All TV shows must contain at least two egregiously pornographic scenes and no violence’…

At that, Obama awoke with a smile on his face…’my dreams have come true…watch out America’.

A scant moment later, Barney Frank drove up in a black limo, and whisked Obama away to make the speech of his life..

uh, i’m kidding, you know. It’s going to be ok, really..I promise.

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Filed under heh heh, Uncategorized

No respect, no respect, I tell ya..

I came into the office this evening to run a couple of jobs that I wasn’t able to do while I was in K-ville. This is what greeted me in the hallway:

makefun2.jpg

There were a half-dozen of these signs. And, in the entrance of my cubicle, I was greeted with:

makefun.jpg

Clearly, an overload of respect is something with which I am not going to be coping.

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Filed under friends and family, heh heh

A recent quote from the daughter’s blog…

made me snicker…

My host mom told me that I had gotten really good at washing my clothes by hand, and finally that meant I could get married. Shoot me

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Filed under friends and family, heh heh

Fred Thompson post of the day..

The Fred ‘gasm’ furor may be slowing down a bit, while we all wait for our plain-speaking-commonsensical Hamlet to make up his mind, but the reaction to Fred and the Dobson proclamation continue to make for fun reading.

This post, by Harding University professor Mark Elrod isn’t exactly brand new (10 days old is six months in blog years), but I wanted to publicize Professor Elrod’s ‘Thompson challenge’ here in Music City, the buckle on the Bible belt.

After Thompson’s ‘church of Christ-ness’ was averred by a Thompson spokesperson, the good professor blogly gauntlet-ed:

The “I Saw Fred Thompson at a Church of Christ” Challenge

The winner will be immortalized in Elrod’s wonderful blog (Mark Elrod’s Lame-O Weblog).

Acceptable sightings include:

* Fred Thompson teaching a Bible class
* Fred Thompson presiding at the Lord’s Table
* Fred Thompson leading singing (if it was 728b and you can prove it, I’ll give you $100)
* Fred Thompson driving the JOY bus
* Mr. & Mrs. Fred Thompson (above) serving as greeters
* Mr. & Mrs. Fred Thompson preparing a nice chicken casserole for a Sunday pot-luck

The idea of Thompson driving the Joy Bus was enough to make me snort coffee. Just as funny are some of the comments made to the post, including one classic ‘Can the Law and Order boink boink theme sound be sung a capella’? Another commenter appears to be donut-knowledgeable Tiffany of Tiff Sniff offering a Donut Den sighting as a possibility.

good times…

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Filed under blogs about blogs, heh heh, politics, the shiznit list

Will Superman stay in the sunshine? Hint: The odds of pleasing all the blue-grassers most of the time is as futile as trying to catch the wind..

To the tune of the Clash…should I stay or should I go…

heh heh

HT: Josh Hutcheson

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Filed under basketball, heh heh

PLAAAY BALL….for the love of the big red machine, please dear God, tell me he governs better than he pitches!

The Mayor of Cincinnati is a right-winger who goes juuuuust a little bit left…

I love the look on ex-Red Eric Davis after the pitch is thrown…

ht: Sports Guy

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Filed under baseball, heh heh

Newsflash: Supreme Court Strips Al Gore of Oscar…

The Supreme Court took away Al Gore’s Oscar today declaring George Bush winner…

My giggling tip o’ the knit cap goes to Vic Bowker.

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Filed under heh heh, irony may be the shackle of youth but I love it