Monthly Archives: September 2006

uh, Mr. Foley, your book is about a year overdue..

Here’s a money quote:

‘We track library books better than we do sexual predators,”

Of course, that’s from the mouth of the former congressman representing the Palm Beach area of Florida, Mark Foley, when he was pushing a bill that would protect children from internet exploitation from adults. This was about the time when he wrote another money quote to his young friend:

“You in your boxers, too? … Well, strip down and get naked.”

If anybody, on either side of the aisle, knew about this activity, and let it go on without attempting to intercede, they should resign tomorrow.

Yeah, Foley’s deeply sorry now. Funny how these guys are always deeply sorry right after they get caught.

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Ain’t we got style, or, Big night at the Schermerhorn


We were lucky last night to be able to finally get tickets to a concert at the new symphony hall. When the Grand Opening $2,500 smackers-a-ticket soiree occurred, I was not invited. I chose to spend that evening at the opening of my friend Susan’s new TV room watching the US Open Women’s Finals. I was wearing Ladies of Charity. A good time was had by me because I got to watch Sharapova on a 58″ flat screen TV. Holy Moly.

Anyway…where was I…Oh yeah, about last night. We did dress up a bit more than the night of Susan’s TV room opening. I was wearing a dark blue dress shirt with light wool brown pants. Lynn was elegant in electric blue and black. The point here is that we sorta looked like we belonged and we did not appear to be barbaric or feckless hooligans. We got to the hall early. We were walking around when we passed a door that said ‘Frost-Brown Party’. Since I wasn’t invited, I wasn’t planning to barge in, but I did turn my head in the general direction of the Frost-Brown clutch of folks because they were dressed to at least the eights, if not the nines, and they were chatting in small groups in one of the beautiful colonnaded porches.

I swear I did not make a move to enter the forbidden Frost-Brown zone. A docent who was standing guard to keep the great unwashed from sullying the Frost-Brown crowd actually SHOVED me by placing her hand on my shoulder and pushing me away…she gestured for a male guard to come over to ensure that I didn’t pollute the F-B area. The guard came over and asked if I was part of the Frost-Brown crowd, and I said no, and asked him where will-call was located, and he gave us directions that gratuitously sent us outside. Luckily it was a beautiful night, so this odd mistreatment didn’t damage the evening irreparably. I’m still confused as to what that docent thought I was going to do.

The new hall is wonderful. I’m not an acoustic expert by any stretch of my own dream, but I can tell you that if there is a hall in this country that has better acoustics, I’ll buy you tickets to a concert there . We were sitting upper balcony , and even up there, you could hear the subtle notes as cleanly as if you were wearing headphones.

Our concert was Bransford Marsalis playing with the Nashville Symphony. They opened without B. Marsalis, and with a little Ravel. I’m not a big fan of the marshmallow light school* of symphonic music, but nonetheless, the tenderest passages and the loudest crescendos were equally clear.

Marsalis, wielding his alto-sax, accompanied the Symphony on Scaramouche and the Concertino da Camera for Alto Saxophone and Orchestra. We were a long way from Mr. Marsalis, but when he played it was if he was leaning on a the wall nearest us, playing just for our section. As you would expect, Marsalis along with his alto-sax were amazing. During one movement**, he did miss a note, and instead of pretending it never happened, he emitted an easily audible ‘awwwwwwwwwwwwww’ groan. The crowd loved that.

The stage is a beautiful dark-orange-hued wood, contrasted with the mint-foam green walls, banded with white and gold panels. It was not at all what I expected. I’m not a big green-wall kinda guy, but the color certainly brought out the beauty of the wood.

Except for the odd shoving incident by my now least favorite docent, the night was outstanding, as is the concert hall. It should also be said that the use of space outside the hall is imaginative and inviting. If you are a money-saver*** like me, you should park by the football stadium and walk over the pedestrian bridge…the walkway down the bridge spills into the broad sidewalk on the north end of the hall, featuring a splendid fountain. Great view…good exercise.

*solo harp passages should be restricted to Marx Brothers movies and after-death experiences.

** Ok, I know not to clap at the end of each movement, and only at the end of the entire piece. But why? Inevitably, at least at the concerts that I can afford to attend, someone, or a few someones, begin clapping after a movement is finished, and then quickly sit on their hands when they realize the only worst faux pas’ would be to fart loudly during a non-woodwind passage.

*** cheap-ass

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Shout out to my Senator, or, when they do an autopsy on this session of congress they’ll have trouble finding the heart…

Just wanted to say thanks to Senator Frist and his party-mates for not extending tax breaks to us middle-class folks for college tuition AND for not extending tax breaks to teachers for classroom expenses, and a BIG thank you from the taxpayers of Tennessee for not extending the deduction for local and state sales tax.

Oh yeah, that suspension of habeas corpus for suspected terrorists…good show, hundreds of years of English common law and constitutional protections for the possibly innocent are so squishy-soft. God knows, if you are accused of being a terrorist, you are damn sure a terrorist. Ask the 10 folks from Gitmo who have actually been brought to trial (vs the other 690 still being held without a trial).

I’m against term limits in general for Senators and members of the House, but I am grateful that you, Senator Frist, are standing by your promise to only serve two terms. I think you’ll quickly see what the rest of the country thinks of you and your leadership here in a couple of years…

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Last comic standing, or, THIS explains a LOTT


In a contest between Larry the Cable Guy and Trent Lott for the funniest act in 2006, I’m going with Trent…Here’s Trent in his own words:

President Bush barely mentioned the war in Iraq when he met with Republican senators behind closed doors in the Capitol Thursday morning and was not asked about the course of the war, Sen. Trent Lott, R-Mississippi, said.

“No, none of that,” Lott told reporters after the session when asked if the Iraq war was discussed. “You’re the only ones who obsess on that. We don’t and the real people out in the real world don’t for the most part.”

Lott went on to say he has difficulty understanding the motivations behind the violence in Iraq.

“It’s hard for Americans, all of us, including me, to understand what’s wrong with these people,” he said. “Why do they kill people of other religions because of religion? Why do they hate the Israelis and despise their right to exist? Why do they hate each other? Why do Sunnis kill Shiites? How do they tell the difference? They all look the same to me.”

There’s so much here..If Bush isn’t bothered with the war in Iraq, and the Republican party really doesn’t think that ‘the REAL WORLD’ cares, then the reason why the post-war has gone so poorly becomes a lot clearer. Actually, in fairness, I don’t think that Lott represents the Republican party on this..I think he represents the ‘STUPID-DUMBASS Party’ (there is some overlap). I can’t imagine the Bush folks being real pleased by Lott’s mental lapses, and I suspect the back bench he sits on in the Senate will be moved to an ante-room.

My favorite part though is the last part where he talks about Iraq. He says he doesn’t understand the violence in Iraq. If he had say, picked up a freakin’ history book in the last 20 years and was able to color comprehend the lessons learned, he might understand there’s been a fissure or two for ummmm, the last few HUNDRED YEARS.

One would have to assume he is still baffled by the Japanese attacking China and Viet Nam in World War II, since those people had to be confused as to who they were fighting, since THEY all look alike.

So, too bad about all those non-real-world people who are dying in Iraq, and the families of those non-real-world soldiers here in America…you’re no longer Page 1…you’re back in the Living section next to the funny papers, funny papers that should be featuring my new comic hero – Trent Lott. I may be white, but I don’t wanna look like you, Trent.

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Who would Jesus torture?


First of all, I’d like to give kudos to Congressman Cooper for voting AGAINST the Bush torture bill which sadly did pass in the House.

I’ve always wondered how a leadership group who claims to be redeemed by the blood of Jesus can so easily justify shedding the blood of others in torturous methods. I’m not talking about waging war or killing others in the course of being at war. I’m talking about THIS.

I’d like to know how any exegesis of the New Testament can possibly be strained or pureed to the point where these folks can stand up and say with the best of their Christian hearts – ‘Jesus understands when we waterboard

I understand that Bush and his folks have a duty to protect us from terrorists. That is supposedly why we attacked the Taliban in Afghanistan. Sadly, we seem to be losing ground on that front, along with losing our moral standing when we continue to endorse torturous behaviour. That’s not just me talking – progressive that I am – those are the the words of Colin Powell, and many others who would not be described as liberals or progressives.

I wish that the magazine ‘Christianity Today’ would make it to the bedstand of Bush and his Christian crusaders for a little nighttime reading. There’s a great article by a professor at Union University (in Jackson, TN.) The professor, David Gushee, writes in bold letters: 5 Reasons Torture Is Always Wrong. He finishes his article with a call to evangelical Christians:

It is past time for evangelical Christians to remind our government and our society of perennial moral values, which also happen to be international and domestic laws. As Christians, we care about moral values, and we vote on the basis of such values. We care deeply about human-rights violations around the world. Now it is time to raise our voice and say an unequivocal no to torture, a practice that has no place in our society and violates our most cherished moral convictions.

I ask ya again, Who would Jesus torture?

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Those liberal moonbat definitions of democracy

Seems the recent military coup in Thailand isn’t meeting with world-wide acclaim. Yesterday, a spokesman for the coup leaders (I love the modern PR age, where even governmental usurpers have spokes-people), commented on the less-than-favorable worldview of the coup..

We are disappointed in their reaction..but we understand their reaction. These are countries who have a very fixed view of democracy

Yeah, sad that we don’t include a military takeover of a democratically elected leader in our stubbornly rigid view of democratic government.

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Yesterday, it was the blond heiress, today it’s that wide receiver for the Cowboys..

I’m more than ready for a certain death-defying wide receiver for the Dallas Cowboys to not be mentioned in the papers, on the sports-talk shows, and on the internet for any other reason than the fact he caught a pass or two for the C’boys. He needs to join the skinny blonde as ‘another who shall not be named’ to paraphase a great humanitarian.

I would offer one exception to a ban on publicity for ‘this guy’. Is there ANY chance we can get ‘this guy’ on the cover of the next edition of the most popular football video game Madden NFL?

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