uh, Mr. Foley, your book is about a year overdue..

Here’s a money quote:

‘We track library books better than we do sexual predators,”

Of course, that’s from the mouth of the former congressman representing the Palm Beach area of Florida, Mark Foley, when he was pushing a bill that would protect children from internet exploitation from adults. This was about the time when he wrote another money quote to his young friend:

“You in your boxers, too? … Well, strip down and get naked.”

If anybody, on either side of the aisle, knew about this activity, and let it go on without attempting to intercede, they should resign tomorrow.

Yeah, Foley’s deeply sorry now. Funny how these guys are always deeply sorry right after they get caught.

Ain’t we got style, or, Big night at the Schermerhorn

We were lucky last night to be able to finally get tickets to a concert at the new symphony hall. When the Grand Opening $2,500 smackers-a-ticket soiree occurred, I was not invited. I chose to spend that evening at the opening of my friend Susan’s new TV room watching the US Open Women’s Finals. I was wearing Ladies of Charity. A good time was had by me because I got to watch Sharapova on a 58″ flat screen TV. Holy Moly.

Anyway…where was I…Oh yeah, about last night. We did dress up a bit more than the night of Susan’s TV room opening. I was wearing a dark blue dress shirt with light wool brown pants. Lynn was elegant in electric blue and black. The point here is that we sorta looked like we belonged and we did not appear to be barbaric or feckless hooligans. We got to the hall early. We were walking around when we passed a door that said ‘Frost-Brown Party’. Since I wasn’t invited, I wasn’t planning to barge in, but I did turn my head in the general direction of the Frost-Brown clutch of folks because they were dressed to at least the eights, if not the nines, and they were chatting in small groups in one of the beautiful colonnaded porches.

I swear I did not make a move to enter the forbidden Frost-Brown zone. A docent who was standing guard to keep the great unwashed from sullying the Frost-Brown crowd actually SHOVED me by placing her hand on my shoulder and pushing me away…she gestured for a male guard to come over to ensure that I didn’t pollute the F-B area. The guard came over and asked if I was part of the Frost-Brown crowd, and I said no, and asked him where will-call was located, and he gave us directions that gratuitously sent us outside. Luckily it was a beautiful night, so this odd mistreatment didn’t damage the evening irreparably. I’m still confused as to what that docent thought I was going to do.

The new hall is wonderful. I’m not an acoustic expert by any stretch of my own dream, but I can tell you that if there is a hall in this country that has better acoustics, I’ll buy you tickets to a concert there . We were sitting upper balcony , and even up there, you could hear the subtle notes as cleanly as if you were wearing headphones.

Our concert was Bransford Marsalis playing with the Nashville Symphony. They opened without B. Marsalis, and with a little Ravel. I’m not a big fan of the marshmallow light school* of symphonic music, but nonetheless, the tenderest passages and the loudest crescendos were equally clear.

Marsalis, wielding his alto-sax, accompanied the Symphony on Scaramouche and the Concertino da Camera for Alto Saxophone and Orchestra. We were a long way from Mr. Marsalis, but when he played it was if he was leaning on a the wall nearest us, playing just for our section. As you would expect, Marsalis along with his alto-sax were amazing. During one movement**, he did miss a note, and instead of pretending it never happened, he emitted an easily audible ‘awwwwwwwwwwwwww’ groan. The crowd loved that.

The stage is a beautiful dark-orange-hued wood, contrasted with the mint-foam green walls, banded with white and gold panels. It was not at all what I expected. I’m not a big green-wall kinda guy, but the color certainly brought out the beauty of the wood.

Except for the odd shoving incident by my now least favorite docent, the night was outstanding, as is the concert hall. It should also be said that the use of space outside the hall is imaginative and inviting. If you are a money-saver*** like me, you should park by the football stadium and walk over the pedestrian bridge…the walkway down the bridge spills into the broad sidewalk on the north end of the hall, featuring a splendid fountain. Great view…good exercise.

*solo harp passages should be restricted to Marx Brothers movies and after-death experiences.

** Ok, I know not to clap at the end of each movement, and only at the end of the entire piece. But why? Inevitably, at least at the concerts that I can afford to attend, someone, or a few someones, begin clapping after a movement is finished, and then quickly sit on their hands when they realize the only worst faux pas’ would be to fart loudly during a non-woodwind passage.

*** cheap-ass

Shout out to my Senator, or, when they do an autopsy on this session of congress they’ll have trouble finding the heart…

Just wanted to say thanks to Senator Frist and his party-mates for not extending tax breaks to us middle-class folks for college tuition AND for not extending tax breaks to teachers for classroom expenses, and a BIG thank you from the taxpayers of Tennessee for not extending the deduction for local and state sales tax.

Oh yeah, that suspension of habeas corpus for suspected terrorists…good show, hundreds of years of English common law and constitutional protections for the possibly innocent are so squishy-soft. God knows, if you are accused of being a terrorist, you are damn sure a terrorist. Ask the 10 folks from Gitmo who have actually been brought to trial (vs the other 690 still being held without a trial).

I’m against term limits in general for Senators and members of the House, but I am grateful that you, Senator Frist, are standing by your promise to only serve two terms. I think you’ll quickly see what the rest of the country thinks of you and your leadership here in a couple of years…

Last comic standing, or, THIS explains a LOTT

In a contest between Larry the Cable Guy and Trent Lott for the funniest act in 2006, I’m going with Trent…Here’s Trent in his own words:

President Bush barely mentioned the war in Iraq when he met with Republican senators behind closed doors in the Capitol Thursday morning and was not asked about the course of the war, Sen. Trent Lott, R-Mississippi, said.

“No, none of that,” Lott told reporters after the session when asked if the Iraq war was discussed. “You’re the only ones who obsess on that. We don’t and the real people out in the real world don’t for the most part.”

Lott went on to say he has difficulty understanding the motivations behind the violence in Iraq.

“It’s hard for Americans, all of us, including me, to understand what’s wrong with these people,” he said. “Why do they kill people of other religions because of religion? Why do they hate the Israelis and despise their right to exist? Why do they hate each other? Why do Sunnis kill Shiites? How do they tell the difference? They all look the same to me.”

There’s so much here..If Bush isn’t bothered with the war in Iraq, and the Republican party really doesn’t think that ‘the REAL WORLD’ cares, then the reason why the post-war has gone so poorly becomes a lot clearer. Actually, in fairness, I don’t think that Lott represents the Republican party on this..I think he represents the ‘STUPID-DUMBASS Party’ (there is some overlap). I can’t imagine the Bush folks being real pleased by Lott’s mental lapses, and I suspect the back bench he sits on in the Senate will be moved to an ante-room.

My favorite part though is the last part where he talks about Iraq. He says he doesn’t understand the violence in Iraq. If he had say, picked up a freakin’ history book in the last 20 years and was able to color comprehend the lessons learned, he might understand there’s been a fissure or two for ummmm, the last few HUNDRED YEARS.

One would have to assume he is still baffled by the Japanese attacking China and Viet Nam in World War II, since those people had to be confused as to who they were fighting, since THEY all look alike.

So, too bad about all those non-real-world people who are dying in Iraq, and the families of those non-real-world soldiers here in America…you’re no longer Page 1…you’re back in the Living section next to the funny papers, funny papers that should be featuring my new comic hero – Trent Lott. I may be white, but I don’t wanna look like you, Trent.

Who would Jesus torture?

First of all, I’d like to give kudos to Congressman Cooper for voting AGAINST the Bush torture bill which sadly did pass in the House.

I’ve always wondered how a leadership group who claims to be redeemed by the blood of Jesus can so easily justify shedding the blood of others in torturous methods. I’m not talking about waging war or killing others in the course of being at war. I’m talking about THIS.

I’d like to know how any exegesis of the New Testament can possibly be strained or pureed to the point where these folks can stand up and say with the best of their Christian hearts – ‘Jesus understands when we waterboard‘

I understand that Bush and his folks have a duty to protect us from terrorists. That is supposedly why we attacked the Taliban in Afghanistan. Sadly, we seem to be losing ground on that front, along with losing our moral standing when we continue to endorse torturous behaviour. That’s not just me talking – progressive that I am – those are the the words of Colin Powell, and many others who would not be described as liberals or progressives.

I wish that the magazine ‘Christianity Today’ would make it to the bedstand of Bush and his Christian crusaders for a little nighttime reading. There’s a great article by a professor at Union University (in Jackson, TN.) The professor, David Gushee, writes in bold letters: 5 Reasons Torture Is Always Wrong. He finishes his article with a call to evangelical Christians:

It is past time for evangelical Christians to remind our government and our society of perennial moral values, which also happen to be international and domestic laws. As Christians, we care about moral values, and we vote on the basis of such values. We care deeply about human-rights violations around the world. Now it is time to raise our voice and say an unequivocal no to torture, a practice that has no place in our society and violates our most cherished moral convictions.

I ask ya again, Who would Jesus torture?

Those liberal moonbat definitions of democracy

Seems the recent military coup in Thailand isn’t meeting with world-wide acclaim. Yesterday, a spokesman for the coup leaders (I love the modern PR age, where even governmental usurpers have spokes-people), commented on the less-than-favorable worldview of the coup..

‘

We are disappointed in their reaction..but we understand their reaction. These are countries who have a very fixed view of democracy‘

Yeah, sad that we don’t include a military takeover of a democratically elected leader in our stubbornly rigid view of democratic government.

Yesterday, it was the blond heiress, today it’s that wide receiver for the Cowboys..

I’m more than ready for a certain death-defying wide receiver for the Dallas Cowboys to not be mentioned in the papers, on the sports-talk shows, and on the internet for any other reason than the fact he caught a pass or two for the C’boys. He needs to join the skinny blonde as ‘another who shall not be named’ to paraphase a great humanitarian.

I would offer one exception to a ban on publicity for ‘this guy’. Is there ANY chance we can get ‘this guy’ on the cover of the next edition of the most popular football video game Madden NFL?

Shout out to the Grascals and Sista, or, All Smiff News edition…

I was happy to see our daily paper give some good column space to the Grascals, bluegrass band extraordinaire. One of my favorite bloggers, Sista Smiff, regularly sleeps with the bass player of the Grascals.

The Sista mom-in-law also gets some coverage on Tennessean’s Page 3 Heather Byrd’s and soon-to-be Beverly Keel’s celebrity sighting/gossip/self-promotion column. It’s the second story.

Culture Notes, or, Is Stars Hollow burning…

I don’t care. I just don’t care. Please stop talking about her. There is a certain blond celebrity who is famous for being famous and she has a lot of money. She may or may not have been drunk when she was arrested for a DUI the other night. I don’t CARE. If we all quit talking about her and reading about her, maybe she will go away…PLEASE..I have nothing against her personally, but I would rather read the worst blog in Nashville* on a daily basis rather than hearing or reading anything more about her. Stop the madness. She has nothing interesting to say and her daily life has no interest to me whatsoever. It shouldn’t matter to you either.

Secondly, I came out of the closet, so to speak, last year on my blog when I admitted to enjoying the Gilmore Girls. The show began as one of the best-written, wittiest shows ever on TV. The two leads were dueling Dorothy Parkers. The setting, the town of Stars Hollow, was one of those quirky New England towns that TV can actually do for a few years without getting cloying. I’m thinking those few years may be up…

Note to the writers of the Gilmore Girls: THE SHOW IS SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY – at least some of the time. The writing is supposed to evoke wit and mirth via the pop-culture-ridden convo. Creating a setpiece where a car crashes into Luke’s diner, even if it is Curt driving the car, is weak. The quirky town characters are wearing thinner than the arms of the subject of the first paragraph (who I really really don’t care about).

Thank you for your time and attention, if you have read this far.

*I actually have several contenders for the worst blog in Nashville. Rest assured, if you are reading this blog, your blog is not in contention. On the other hand, you may be reading one of the contenders….

Hello, my name is George, and I am a racist..

It’s Ok, George. Just admit it. Let it out..you knew what Macaca meant..you knew what that noose hanging from a tree in your office meant..you knew that declaring a Confederate Heritage Month when you were Governor would offend plenty of folks..you knew that that giant Confederate flag in your living room when you were governor stood for something that really wasn’t quite right…you knew endorsing the Conservative Citizens Council* was offensive to some people…you knew that calling folks the ‘N’ word back in your high school days was wrong….you knew that driving that Camaro with the confederate flag on the hood might offend a few people…and how about that racist grafitti you used to tag in high shool…you know that the NAACP is not an extremist group…you knew when you joined that racially exclusive social club in Richmond when you were governor was probably a mistake, considering that the three governors before you refused the invitation to join..you knew that Trent Lott’s endorsement of Strom Thurmond’s Dixiecrat racism was stupid, but you went along..Come on George..just say it..breathe deeply..exhale…ADMIT it…it’ll feel GOOD!

*Statement of Purpose of the Conservative Citizens Council, formerly known as the WHITE Citizens Council: We believe that the United States derives from and is an integral part of European civilization and the European people and that the American people and government should remain European in their composition and character.
We therefore oppose the massive immigration of non-European and non-Western peoples into the United States that threatens to transform our nation into a non-European majority in our lifetime.
We also oppose all efforts to mix the races of mankind, to promote non-white races over the European-American people through so-called “affirmative action” and similar measures, to destroy or denigrate the European-American heritage, including the heritage of the Southern people, and to force the integration of the races.

5th Avenue is gettin’ arty – Arts in the Arcade is happening

I eat in the arcade two or three times a week and I’ve been noticing a lot of arty-looking characters roaming around. I knew that there were a couple of art galleries open in the arcade upper level…what I didn’t know is that there are at least EIGHT galleries opening up..

This collective of galleries is having a big art opening on October 7th…from 6:00 to 9:00 PM in conjunction with the official TAG opening. TAG is the gallery on the ground floor of the KRESS loft building across 5th from the Arcade.

Check out the official site: Art at the Arcade

Studio 60, episode 2 – wow, or, boom goes the dynamite*

Episode 1 was prelude..Tonight’s show was a great pay-off. This one reminded me of Sorkin’s first show (at least first i know about) Sports Night, a behind-the-scenes show of something akin to ESPN’s Sports Center..lots of cuts, quick edits and snappier dialogue than Dorothy Parker* * holding forth at the Algonquin back in the day.

Sorkin always knew how to write ‘guy talk’..eventually on the West Wing, he figured out to write meaty parts for the women as well. Amanda Peet as NBS (read NBC) president and Sarah Paulson as the star of the show within the show are outstanding. The Paulson character is an outspoken Christian..a type that rarely gets written with any kind of subtlety or nuance. TV Christians are usually hypocrites, ramrod-up-the-ass types, or pious nut jobs. So far, the writers are treating Paulson’s character as a human..

But..the guys, at least so far, in the persons of Matt Perry and Bradley Whitford, rock the party. These guys have more chemistry than Sonny & Cher, Tom and Dick Smothers and Bill O’ Reilley and himself, put together.

If only these guys could produce and write the REAL Saturday Night Live….

Please watch Studio 60..I really really wanna see the show unfurl over an entire season.

*Boom goes the dynamite

**one of my favorite D. Parker lines: “That woman speaks eighteen languages and can’t say ‘no’ in any of them.”

Here’s a fun family photo, or, hey Fatima, don’t close your eyes!

Which one was Fatima, again?

ft: Dennis Dumbauld

My life in the danger zone…

For the first time since the great e coli scare of ’06, I ventured to the Greek Touch in the Arcade for my favorite downtown meal – Spanokopita (spinach pie). Bill and Linda make a mean SP…If I pass from this mortal coil because of eating spinach, I want everyone to know that I went out on a great meal.

I’m nothing if not intrepid…

Would you lie to your shrink?

The Certifiable Princess did and she lived to talk about it. Not to mention being grossed out about hearing her mother discussing sex (parents have sex???..ewwwwwww).

Go, read. It’s as if Aunt B had a surprise distant cousin somewhere up north…

At least the Titans made it interesting, or, Kerry Collins, meet David Givens..

The good news for the Titans today was that they were playing another weak team masquerading as the Miami Dolphins who were led by a once-good quarterback named Daunte Culpepper who now has the lateral movement of a 1958 Cadillac. The bad news is that the Titans weren’t quite as good as the weak team masquerading as the Dolphins.

Titan’s quarteback Kerry Collins threw a few really sweet passes to go along with the half-dozen overthrown attempts to wide open receivers. Collins appears to have at least had a get-to-know-you-meeting with the tight ends, Drew Bennett and the heretofore sorely under-utilized free-agent aquisition David Givens. Givens was the highlight of the day for the losing Titans, imo.

The defense managed to contain the Fish most of the game, sacking the beleaguered Culpepper four times (at least). My new Titan hero, the awakening defensive back Courtland Finnegan made some great plays including a fumble recovery deep in Fish territory. When, oh when will an enterprising jersey maker release the ’31’ jersey for sale to the general public. I am so looking forwarding to attending a Titan’s home game in my ‘Finnigan’ gear.

So, all in all, the Titan’s game was an improvement over the first two debacles and gives us some reason for optimism*, even though the Dolphins are no one’s Super Bowl pick.

*optimism as defined by making some of the future games interesting enough to watch well into the fourth quarter if not the entire game. The brand of optimism does not extend to the belief that the Titans will win many games this year.

Who’s running this war on terror, Vandelay Industries?, or how we are screwing up Afghanistan again..

And you wanted to be my war against terrorism President!?

Let’s go back to 2001, before 9/11. What country gave the Taliban in Afghanistan $43,000,000 (that’s MILLION) dollars to help our friends, the Taliban, in their war against drugs. Incidentally, these same ‘friends’ were hosting this guy named Bin Laden at the time. Of course, our pals, the Taliban, ‘gave its order to halt cultivation merely to drive up the price of opium the regime had already stockpiled’.

These supposed anti-drug friends:

prohibited the education of girls, tortured and executed political critics, and required non-Muslims to wear distinctive clothing–a practice eerily reminiscent of Nazi Germany’s requirement that Jews display the Star of David on their clothing. Yet U.S. officials deemed none of that to be a bar to cooperation with the Taliban on drug policy.

Hmmmmm. Forty-three million bucks…2001…making the world safe against terrorism. Wonder how they spent some of that $43,000,000 bucks.

Soooo, after 9/11, we muster together the strength to actually invade Afghanistan and uproot the Taliban, who we now see were bad guys all along. We banded groups of anti-Taliban warloads together, and stitched together a democracy. A worthy cause to be sure, and it was actually working, until…

We got distracted by the war in Iraq. Our attention, and most of our troops got refocused. We’re still there attempting to referee what is becoming a civil war. Our own intelligience is reporting that our war in Iraq is worsening the terrorist threat.

Meanwhile back in Afghanistan, guess who’s back!!! Those wacky Taliban guys, closing down the schools, keepin’ the girls in the kitchen. The war we should have fought and won, is going backward.

And these are the guys who we trust to fight terrorism?

Aw, quit yer griping, or, ENUFF already

So far this week I’ve moaned and bitched about ‘our’ Kroger on 8th Avenue, people in front of me in line at Walgreens, Eric Crafton’s moronic misdirected ‘English-only first’ bill, that idiotic mis-cast statue on I-65 south, and the worst Titan’s team ever OUR TITANS.

There are positive things in life:

Unless Sarcastro‘s wife has evolved into a parthenogenesis state, Sar has sired a child and is evolving into an enlightened Daddy blogger.

The new ‘Ollabelle‘ CD ‘Riverside Battle Songs’ is just freaking amazing. After 9/11 a bunch of New Yorkers started hanging out in this East Village bar to sing old gospel songs. One of them was Levon Helm’s daughter (Levon was the drummer for ‘The Band’ and the incredible voice behind ‘The Night they Drove Old Dixie Down’). These gospel sings led to the formation of ‘Ollabelle’. If you don’t know ‘Ollabelle’, you should…really!.

We had a trip to Target where we found the stuff we needed, some other stuff on sale that we kinda needed, and had a great check-out experience chatting with some friends and a really cool check-out clerk. I love the Target.

Lunch at the Mothership on Wednesday with the birthday Ivy, along with Kathy T and their friend Beth was fun. Now that my wife has met a few bloggers (Cobles, Kerry Woo, Sarcastro, Aunt B, Sharon, Ivy and Kathy), she understands that the blogging community for the most part is safer than the crystal meth crowd at Springwater’s circa 2:00 AM (not that I’ve really hung with them…).

I finally got to eat at Hot Kabobs on White Bridge Road. It’s every good thing that Kay West said, and more. I’d never heard of sun-dried lime before (perhaps I really am a sheltered Nashvillian), but these guys know what to do with it…wow.

Salemtown got featured on Channel 2 news, and it wasn’t because of gang activity. As Ice Cube once said so eloquently,

Today I didn’t even have to use my A.K.
I got to say it was a good day

More theology from Senator Allen, or, Oy Vey, do I have to wear one of those beanies?

Incumbent Senator George Allen of Virginia, after being hounded by the media regarding his Jewish ‘roots’, decided to do a little reading:

“I embrace and take great pride in every aspect of my diverse heritage, including my Lumbroso family line’s Jewish heritage, which I learned about from a recent magazine article and my mother confirmed.”

And just to show the proper gravitas he added:

: “I still had a ham sandwich for lunch. And my mother made great pork chops.”

I’m wondering if Allen took one of those zany quizzes…I’m also thinking his opponent, Democrat challenger James Webb, should maybe just not say anything and let George do all the talking.

Borrowed shamelessly from MSNBC.

Did they serve omelets at the Last Supper, or, God, you’re so STUPID

Theological conversation overheard…classic from Knox Views.