Is putting this on your license plate all that smart?

Lambs dine with Lions, Bloods embrace Crips, Cumberland no longer polluted – it’s Fred-gasm-tastic..

What was that sound you didn’t hear..the world is not ending..the healing has begun? Soft pattern of rain falling on our parched city? The grip of poverty growing weaker on the less privileged? Oil crisis over..prices for gas plummeting? America gasps….heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeres Fredddddddddddd.

Actually, I like Fred T*. I do believe he’s sincere, but the truth is, he’s a lot sexier when he’s on the sidelines, pronouncing, observing, nodding sagely in the direction of the noise. Now that he appears to be actually within a few feet of RUNNING, some of the fervor, some of the facade will begin to show cracks. His wisdom will move from the general to the specific and people will actually find things to disagree with…

I will say that from this corner, he’s the one Republican from this field (other than Guliani – and I’ll bet the farm and the mineral rights under the farm that Rudy CAN fail to get the G.O.P. nomination), that might have a chance in 2008. I will also say that unless the Dems pull a 1972 trick out of the disaster bag, this is a Democratic sweep coming up (and not a nanosecond too soon).

It’s often more fun to anticipate than actually arrive..here’s betting that Fred’s feet of gold show a little clay in the cracks. He’s not the hardest working man in show bizness, and that actually may be a good thing.

As an aside…gooodgravy, it’s May 2000freaking7, and we’re in the throes of the campaign. Maybe it’s because most of America is so ready to get rid of the current bunch..

*I’ve told this story before, but it still impresses me. Back when I lived over near the greater Green Hills area (on the poor side), I’d often saunter in to a certain Den of Donuts for an old fashioned (donut, not cocktail..i don’t think the Foxes have a liquor permit) and some excellent coffee. Many times, even when he was a Senator, I’d see Fred over in the corner reading a newspaper or chatting with buddies. No entourage, no campaigning…just Fred being Fred. I know that doesn’t necessarily equate to presidential timber, but in the eyes of this lefty, I have always admired him for that.

One thumb partially up, and one thumb way down for the Prez..

Let’s start with the razzzberry.  The federal government has often engaged in what could be called in some circles as creative accounting (shocking, I realize).  Other circles might be in debtor’s prison if they engaged in those practices, but the government is sovereign, so they get to do that kinda stuff.

According to USA Today, today, we, the people, unknowingly absorbed a 1.3 TRILLION dollar loss last year.  Not billion, but TRILLION.  Not the $248 Billion deficit reported by the Bush team.  This is six years into a REPUBLICAN administration.

I’d just like to remind the fiscally responsible Republicans in the viewing area that Bill Clinton (a Democrat), balanced the budget and actually left the incoming Prez with a surplus.  Yeah, he had some help from the GOP in congress, but he was the President and he get’s a lot of the credit.  Just like the one occupying the Oval Office right now.   I thought that THESE were the bizness guys???

Thumbs kinda up for President Bush for his news conference this AM announcing sanctions against Sudan and for some of the folks who do bizness with Sudan.   I understand that the Sudanese government has resisted pressure by not allowing outside peace-keepers into their world of genocide, but it’s past time to make a stand.

Thumbs will go way up for the President if he puts his muscle to work with China’s involvement in the Sudanese crisis.  China imports a lotta oil from Sudan and swaps at least some of that oil for weapons.  Will we have the conjones to point that out publicly?  Will we use the upcoming Olympics in Beijing as a platform to condemn the Chinese for the blood on their hands?

Keep the pressure on Mr. President..keep the pressure on.

Hey, Let’s Blame the Media, or the ass that cried Wolf(owitz)..

I wish I could have blamed the media many years ago when I made a disastrous choice regarding retirement funds accrued from my first ‘real’ job.  I won’t go into the painful details, but the ramifications lingered for years. It was my choice, but I should have realized that the media with all their advertisements and economic fruit hanging from the tree of good and stupid were really to blame.  If I’d only been well-known enough to chastise the digitally stained nee’ ink-stained wretches responsible for my debacle.

I say this after reading that Paul Wolfowitz is blaming the media for his resignation from the World Bank.  I guess it was Forbes Magazine, or maybe was it the Washington Post, that dictated the overly-generous terms of departure from the World Bank for his girlfriend.  Maybe it was WKRN that ensured that exclaimed ‘AHA”, let’s get a job for Shaha.  Maybe the State Department would be a great place for her to gain new employment.

Paul, you make me sick.  You and your neo-con pals helped engineer what is turning into the worst foreign policy fiasco of our generation.  And no, the media didn’t kill one damn American military member or wound the hundreds of thousands of our troops, many of whom lost limbs for your obscenity.  NBC didn’t kill 80,000 Iraqi civilians, and foment the civil war that your folly was supposed to pave over with democracy.

The media didn’t reward your folly with a position at the World Bank, and I don’t think anyone at the New York Times opined that your girlfriend should get the golden parachute from your peers at the Bank.

So…here’s my little guy advice to Paul Wolfowitz.  Shut the f**k up.

Lounging at the Bounce B to Beantown Bash, or, I’m too much like Jimmy Swaggart (I like to watch…)

Here’s the sad deal. I can’t sing. I mean, I really really really can’t sing. I would love to sing. I can lip synch like a mofo. I really can’t dance, but I do understand where the beat belongs. I also can’t drink. It’s not a moral or religious thing. It’s a damn health thing. I won’t bore you, but between some very odd allergies and a very morose stomach, drinking just doesn’t work.

Soooo, when the party is at a karaoke bar, it’s gonna be a rough combination. Add in the fact that I far more enjoy sitting around with 2-4-6 folks than trying to figure out how to act at a party when everyone is drinking dancing or singing, this is not my strength.

All of this is to say..so what..it was a night for Aunt B..a night to toss some $$ in a bucket and send our playwright to Boston to see her own play. She certainly deserves the accolades.

Ms. B looked scrumptious in black and white. Ginger also looked quite fetching in black and white. I was also clad in those two non-colors, but it didn’t quite come off the same way.

I should add here that my wife looked wonderful, and I’m not just saying that because I’m supposed to…she’s got black and white hair and I love every follicle.

I wish I had the talent just to sing a little back-up for someone who can sing. I wish I had the balls just to get up in front of people and not care. Slarti and Ginger can sing. A whole lot of bloggers can sing better than they claim (Brittney and B doing ‘Jolene’ rocked the house). Shauna, who didn’t get up, but who works a good hairbrush can sing (I was loitering nearby).

Ivy who apparently skipped ‘inhibition day’ at her elementary school blew the roof off the place more than once (including leading a merry band of bloggers in a rousing ‘Love Shack’). Always enjoy the Ivy…

People I only know from initials and names from B’s blog shimmered amongst the crowd. Plimco, who looked to be around 15, has a great voice, and is apparently going to be in ‘the play’.

Coble has always been one of my heroes, with her honesty, faith, and nose for trouble, solidified her standing with a gutsy LouReedish version of Warren Zevon’s ‘Werewolves of London’. Kat apparently has a voice somewhat in my range, but damn, she did it, and hit the ‘ahhhooooooos’ nicely.

I jonesed on Jag’s new glasses all night and got to hang around with her some, which is always fun. My neighbors Kate and Karsten looked smashing, and may actually have been smashing at one point late in the evening.

Mack god-fathered the party, and I appreciate him macking the party together. He even got up for a little ‘Love Shack’ action.

My extended convo for the evening was with Mary Mancini…no occasion is in-apt to discuss politics imo, and that we did. I wish Mary would run for something! I should also mention that Mary did her own re-written version of Beyonce ‘to the left’, and left the audience wanting more. Her back-up dancers were somewhat directionally challenged (often going to ‘the other left’ instead).

It was also quite cool to meet ‘NM‘ and chat with her a bit (I love it when bloggers take on a more corporal form than just their words on a screen).

My wife, who is somewhat intimidated by blogger-nation, left after a couple of hours, and I hung around on the patio a bunch with primo-lens-man Chris Wage, who according to every woman in the house is now beyond cute without the beard. I was rather taken with his hairless chin myself.

So, what holds me back? I feel borrring, I feel borrrring, and sometimes I just don’t care. I could blame my age, my year’s attendance in inhibition class, my mom (what would the neighbor’s think), my depressing life of Sunday School, my head, which grew to adult size in the 5th grade (no one laughed or made fun, except in grades 6 thru 12), or the fact that my one discernible talent is a pretty damn good Bullwinkle imitation.

Someday I’m going to find a cartoon imitator’s bar, and then, dang it..i’m going to be something.

Last night was of the good though, even if only from a one-step removed vantage point.

You go B!

Keeping abreast of the hockey news..sometimes its TooToo much

With all the talk about the impending sale of the Preds to Mr. Blackberry, I missed an equally massive story. It seems that American Idol also-ran Kellie Pickler has further enhanced her career by becoming the girlfriend of ‘an Eskimo’ (her words).

Our own (or should that be ‘Hamilton/Kansas City/Winnipeg/Waterloo’s own), Jordin Tootoo, the worlds most famous Inuit, has been dating Pickler since January.

Somehow, this doesn’t assuage the pain…

Hey Representative Campfield…

BOO!

I’m still snickering at the ‘Rep’s excuse for not voting for the ‘Rosa Parks’ law*. When asked why, ‘Stacey X’ responded that he was against pardoning members of groups that advocate violence, such as “the Black Panthers.”

Shouldn’t people representing the state be required to say learn a little freaking history of the state. Can the Rep come up with ONE Black Panther arrest in the state of Tennessee? Puh-leeeeze.

Mr. ‘0 for 50’ comes up short again.

*The Rosa Parks law basically expunges so-called crimes from the book that were committed while protesting against segregation. Rosa Park’s arrest for not moving to the back of the bus was ‘removed’ when Alabama passed a similiar law.

Can a lame duck be a Predator?, or, Apparently Leipold does change his spots, or, does Balsillie give you the willies?

The theme music for today’s post is from Jethro Tull. ‘Skating away..skating away…’

I read the news today, oh boy. A lucky* man apparently made the grade. The man behind the technology behind your Blackberry is about to buy what is soon going to be our ‘former’ Predators. The poor guy, Jim Balsillie, is apparently only the 186th richest person in the world.

Predator’s current owner Craig Leipold has long committed to keeping the team in Nashville, taking out full page ads to assure us hockey fans that the Preds would be skating in Nashville for years and years to come.

Sadly, he must have literally meant two years. Mr. Balsillie isn’t buying the team to keep the Preds in our city. He wants a team for Hamilton, Ontario. He may give us some lip (service) about keeping the team in Music City, but truthfully, he’ll be singing a different song to his peeps in Maple-land.

I’ve enjoyed the Preds and been a partial-season-ticket holder for several years. Unfortunately, the ratio of people like me, is way too high in comparison to corporate sponsorship. I’d love to be part of a fandom that could convince Mr. Balsillie that we’d stand on guard for the future of ice hockey in Nashville, but honestly…Balsillie to Nashville will soon have the ring of ‘Bud Adams’ to the follks down in Houston.

*lucky as defined by Thomas Edison. 90% perspiration, 10% inspiration.

America(n Idol) where are you now?, or ‘Say Cheeeese’

I may have been just slightly distracted while kind of watching the American Idol finale last night. After all, ‘my’ Yankees were putting the Red Sox back in their place*, and there may have been some Instant Messaging going on with another AI viewer, but I do want to share some impressions and ask a few questions.

First of all, why is it somehow important for white guys who attempt to rap or ‘beat-box’ with true rappers (rapper of any color who would actually draw an audience of more than 12 if he/she was headlining) to wear their hat sideways. Does anyone over the age of three consider this ‘street’?

Secondly, Doug E. Fresh does not come close to living up to his last name. Was Fab 5 Freddy busy last night?

Tony Bennett is still amazing. I’m thinking he will probably sing at his own funeral.

What did the Beatles do to American Idol to deserve THAT kind of treatment? I’ve seen less cheese at a road-side store in Wisconsin. As a member of the Beatles generation, I’m looking for some other folks my age to file some kind of class-action suit. I don’t want the children of today to think THAT is what the Beatles sounded like.

Is Steven Tyler dying? There has to be some kind of explanation as to why Joe Perry would appear on AI, especially playing guitar for Sanjaya’s lame version of the Kinks. When the Kinks sang ‘You really got me’, they were talking about the sexual charge of a certain young woman. When Sanjaya “sings” it, I think he’s talking about cooties. Sanjaya has all the grit of a young Pat Boone without the voice.

Smokey Robinson will sound good as long as Tony Bennett. ‘Tears of a Clown’ was an appropriate song choice for last night.

Other people came and went…Green Day and Gwen Stefani had the good sense to send in a taped performance.

Two hours of this nonsense was about 90 minutes+ too much. Yeah, I”m glad Jordin won, and even that was almost anti-climatic after all the frommage.

Oh yeah..Jordin had to sing what is going to be the first ‘single’ from this year’s Idol show..I think the song is called ‘Where is my Cow?**”. Appropriate considering all that cheeeeeze.

*I’m fully aware that the Yanks are 9 1/2 games behind the Sox at this point. I have every confidence that the Sox will collect lint during July and August and the Yanks will catch up.

**I may have mis-heard the title. It might be ‘This is my Cow”.

How many Iraqi army battalions are battle ready, again?

Hmmm, haven’t heard much about that lately.  Last time I checked it was either one or none.  The Dems in Congress have bowed to political reality and given up on a timetable for withdrawal.  Instead, some type of benchmarks will be in place (benchmarks based on security, economic progress and political reforms) when the latest spending bill is passed.

Trouble is, the Sunni’s are about to back out of the unity government. They want more power.  More power in this case comes at the expense of the Kurds.  The Kurds are the folks we need to be protecting anyway.

Before the latest Iraqi war, the enforced flyover zone over Kuwait resulted in a near-autonomous Kurdish state.  A safe Kurdish state IS a political and military reality.

Current Iraqi military and police are rife with militia from either the Sunni or Shia side.  Many don’t understand what they are really fighting for…Funny that you don’t hear much about ‘we’ll stand down when they stand up’ rhetoric anymore.

The truth is, the only benchmarks that have been in place were those set up by this administration as to why we went to war and what is happening while we are in Iraq.  Sadly those benchmarks change on a regular basis, but only when the truth destroys the previous benchmark.

The Democrats were elected to challenge the White House and its protean war plan.   Those of us who elected the Dems into power are keeping benchmarks of our own.  Keeping the heat on Bush and his war machine is job one.

How many of those Iraqi battalions are ready, again?

Should be a green day for Jordin on Idol, or, don’t wanna vote for an American idiot…

Tonight on AI..

Jordin aced himShe baked himShe cooked himShe diced himShe electrocuted himShe fried himshe gored himShehammered himshe iced himShe jaked himshe kicked his assshe lambasted himshe mashed himshe neutered him(short trip)She OnO’d himShe pasted himShe quick, he sickshe racked himShe stove-piped himshe toasted himSheun-did himshe vitiated himShe wrecked himshe X’d him outShe yoked his assshe zinged him

RoLL joRdin…

That special gift that keeps on giving, or, in the words of Roberto Duran, ‘no mas’…

Fist Tap: Phil Arnold

That Rush Limbaugh sho’ is funny, or, Chapter 10 on why conservative spokespersons can’t be racists

Don Imus got the heave-ho from the radio show because his support, while wide, was shallow. Rush Limbaugh’s support is not wide, but it is deep. Apparently Rush can pretty much say anything he wants to and the ditto-heads and sycophants, while perhaps disagreeing specifically, barely raise a voice in protest.

The 4-times divorced spokesman for morality has a fine record of utterances that would fit well on the old Amos and Andy show…I suspect if he thought he could do the dialect, he’d be channeling Amos, Andy and perhaps Lightning. It’s not much of a leap from laughing and shaking while making fun of Michael J. Fox and his Parkinson’s disease…

Amos: Why don’t people pay attention to po’ black folks?

Limbaugh: ‘They’re only 12 percent of the population. Who cares?*

Amos: What do you think about dis’ NAACP?

Limbaugh: The NAACP should have riot rehearsal. They should get a liquor store and practise robberies.

Amos: If I called yo’ show and sounded black what would you say to me?

Limbaugh: Take that bone out of your nose and call me back.

Amos: How ’bout dat Jesse Jackson?

Limbaugh: Have you ever noticed how all composite pictures of wanted criminals resemble Jesse Jackson?

I have to stop now..this stuff is killin’ me. Rush is SUCH a card…And he knows his football..he claimed that the media are down on Rex Grossman because he’s white, and pro-Donovan McNabb because he’s black**.

The media is down on Grossman because he blows chunks as a pro-QB. All McNabb ever did was lead his Philadelphia Eagles to four straight freakin’ NFC championships.

Oh yeah..I almost forgot…that ‘Obama the Magic Negro’ song..toooo much. If you’d just do the show in black-face, you might have something…

*All Limbaugh quotes were actually said by Rush Limbaugh.

**Other than Sean Saulsbury the media seems to have been rather taken with our own Vince Young.

Showin’ up in Salemtown – Exton, Gilmore and Player

In August, we will have lived in Salemtown for three years. The Salemtown Neighbors Association has been in place nearly that long. Our city councilman, Ludye Wallace, has not attended any of our meetings. Our city councilman, Ludye Wallace, has not returned phone calls or answered our e-mails. It took a contingency of ‘Neighbors’ attending a council meeting public hearing for Ludye to respond to our pleas on a recent zoning issue.

It shouldn’t be that hard. I’ve seen Ludye in our neighborhood exactly once. Perhaps if I lived near 1000 Buchanan Street, I might see him a little more often.

Last night our association held its monthly meeting. I do know it’s election season, but I was impressed that two of the candidates for District 19 (our council district) along with a candidate for Metro-Council-at-Large showed up. We are not a large group, but we do make noise. Candidates Erica Gilmore and Freda Player showed more interest in our association in one hour than we have received in two years from our current councilman, and color me naive, I don’t think that interest will evaporate once the election is completed.

I was also pleased that candidate Richard Exton made an appearance. He’s running county-wide, and our neighborhood is a relatively small slice of the pie.

All three candidates made a short plea for votes during the meeting, but I was far more impressed with the conversation after the meeting and the fact that they hung around, no glancing lustily at the exits.

Ludye has promised us a community meeting. If it occurs, I’ll be grateful. Just showing up can’t be all that hard.

A recent quote from the daughter’s blog…

made me snicker…

My host mom told me that I had gotten really good at washing my clothes by hand, and finally that meant I could get married. Shoot me

Don’t want to be meal-y mouthed here, 5 places I like to eat..

I”m IT! Couldn’t get away from the Newscoma tag*. Name five places you like to eat at your location.

Man, I love to find places to eat around town, so five is too low of a number..I’ll try to keep it down (the number, not my food).

1. Alleycats – best enchiladas in N’ville. Great patio. Funky vibe.

2. Mothership BBQ – of course this is on my list. I know the owner. I know lots of the clientele, but truth is, if the pulled pork wasn’t all that good, all the love in the world wouldn’t influence me to drive into the heart of Berry Hill. I eat LOTS of BBQ. This is the best pulled pork in Nashville.

3. Nola’s – love those chavitas sandwiches. Alexia, the chef, is passionate about her food, and enjoys chatting with the diners.

4. Samurai Sushi – sushi Nirvana. Funky hole-in-the-wall on Elliston Place make sushi magic. The Choo Choo Roll is a work of art.

5. Peter’s Sushi – out in B’wood, but worth the drive. In the expert opinions of my wife and I (we eat a LOT of sushi), Peter has caught up with Mr. Choo at Samurai Sushi, almost.

6. Greek Touch – in the arcade. You will not eat better spanokopita in the area unless you’re married to Chris Clark or Demetria K. Bill and Linda are entertaining behind the counter. Great souvlaki also.

7. Cafe Marche’ – best brunch in Nashville at prices a non-rich person can afford. Plus the place is damn good. Even their oatmeal rocks, and I’m not kidding. Best omelets around.

I’m tagging Busymom (I wanna hear where she eats around work) and Suburban Turmoil (the best rivalry in soccer mommy-hood, ever). This is part of my ‘secret’ strategy to have top-notch bloggers stoop to my level.

*There is a big long list of where this tag comes from on Newscoma’s link above. But, it is Sunday and I’m toooo lazy to type all those links.

The strawberry capital of the world is WHERE?, or, Strawberry wields forever..

When I was a kid growing up in Nashville there were certain certifiable truths that we took for granted. Being a ‘member of the church’ (if you are, you know what I’m talking about) gave you a shot at heaven (sadly those other churches were rife with false doctrine and quasi-Satanic teachings (i.e. Catholics). I began to see through some of that when I reached my teens, but one certainty I would stand upon (as firm as the rock of Gibraltar) was that Portland, Tennessee was the ABSOLUTE strawberry capital of the world.

It was a given..you think strawberries..you think Portland. In my college years I drove down to Memphis to see the Stones. A sign on the highway almost caused me to doubt my very existence: Humboldt Tennessee: Strawberry Capital of the World!. Say what??? I knew those flat-lander West Tennessee types were backwards, but I thought they at least knew the verities of life, including the REAL strawberry capital of the world.

Now, thanks to Google, I’ve discovered an even scarier truth (almost like finding out there are people you know in those Santa Claus suits): Plant City, Florida is ‘Strawberry Capital of the World’…wait a minute: Oxnard, California is ‘Strawberry Capital of the World’…no, no..Ponchatoula, Louisiana is the freaking ‘Strawberry Capital of the World’.

So now, in a world over-ridden with moral relativism and confusion, I would like some certainty. I want to know the truth. Let’s have a ‘berry-off”. Let’s bury the contenders, and crown the champs. I want to know that at least one of those facts I learned as a child holds up, doubtlessly and surely (at least as firm as the Rock of Gibraltar).

Ophelia, you’re breaking my head, you’re shaking our confidence daily

Recently, in what is now a well-known episode, State Senator Ophelia Ford goes into goofy-land in a speech to representatives of the Department of Children’s Services. The issue at hand was regarding a DCS investigation and had NOTHING to do with death certificates.

If you havn’t seen Senator Ophelia Ford’s 19th nervous breakdown, go HERE

According to a Sharon Cobb post, Senator Ford says she hasn’t been feeling well but that there was nothing strange about her statements at Monday’s Department of Children’s Services hearing.

Here’s my advice, and it comes at some sacrifice*. Use some of that state surplus money each of you Senators are to receive, and hire yourself a psychologically certified ‘normal’ human with an enlightened sense of ‘strange’. Equip the ‘strange’ monitor with some sort of buzzer system. Every-time you go into bizarre-land, your monitor will quickly assess the situation and will press a button which will transmit a small shock somewhere on your person. Each subsequent shock will be slightly juicier until you either become incapacitated or totally cured via the miracle of shock therapy.

Seriously, if you don’t think this behavior is strange, you have reached new levels of ‘Ford-esque’ mal-behavior, and believe me, the bar was already set pretty high by the man you replaced in office.

*I was really hoping you ‘guys’ could use some of that surplus for a meager raise for us state employees.

Breaking the pending Immigration Bill down..OR, Buddy, can you spare $5,000..

I’ve been studying the proposed immigration bill and I’m here to tell you that this one has something for everyone…

First of all: If you are here illegally, you must report to the nearest bar, down a shot of something with 10% or more alcohol. Take a second, and then a third shot. Then, recite the alphabet backwards while ‘signing’ each letter.

After successfully passing step one, acquire a degree in some really important field, such as engineering or astro-physics. At this point, either go back to your native country and apply to come back (the better the degree, the better your place in line), or, ask your employee for a low-interest loan of $5,000 to pay the government so that you can stay in the country for another two years.

When your employer laughs in your face (after all, you don’t have an important degree yet, right?), go to one of those popular ‘Our money for your testicles’ check-cashing joints where the interest accrues hourly and you have to pledge your car to get the $5,000 to pay the government in order to stay in the country for two more years.

Oh yeah, send your family back to your native country, so that they can get advanced degrees so that they can get a good place in line.

While you’re ‘raising’ the $5,000 to stay in the country, you do have to wait until the government sets up some kind of combination laser/high wall border impediment (this is known as a ‘trigger) which has to occur before you can really stay in the country for two years.

Oh yeah, after you pay the money, recite the alphabet backwards while signing each letter, work towards your advanced degree and saying goodbye to your family for two years, you have to go back to your native country and remain there for at least one more year. I guess you can work on your advanced degree during that time, while reacquainting yourself with the fam.

I may have left something out, but in the meantime, Happy Cinco Miles Day!

I’m guessing Tyson Chicken may have some openings in the near future, if you happen to be job-hunting.

TV or not TV – Is there life on (veronica) Mars?

I’m here to celebrate the life of Veronica Mars. Long may she live in TV re-run perpetuity. VM was, (and sadly I must say was because the CheeseWads at the CW network hosting VM have decided there is no more life on V. Mars) an intelligent show, plotted craftily, not only with great story arcs, but with enough savvy to give you episodic happiness.

There is a great mid-point in the spectrum of TV where intelligent shows with real plots and real people (as opposed to intelligent shows with polar bears on islands or esoteric X-plots) that don’t rely heavily on sex/skin/innuendo, such as Veronica M, or Friday Night Lights, reside.. These shows always attract rabid, savvy fans, but not enough rabid savvy fans to sustain the show for more than three years (if that long).

Friday Night Lights survived the cut this year and will re-appear next season..that’s the good news. The bad news is that FNL is scheduled for 9:00CST/10:00EST on freakin’ Friday nights. I realize there is some symmetry there, but the audience for this show actually has the kind of life that doesn’t include consistently watching TV on Friday nights. Thank God for DVR/TIVO, but do the network small-g gods care about the TIVO crowd?

Intelligent shows with inpenetrable plots (Lost, X-Files) seem to have a longer shelf-life, but often turn from inpenetrable to incomprehensible (anybody: describe the last 20 episodes of X-Files and the mythology). I’m here to grovel for shows that don’t need the extra-sensory, but have an ear and eye for the extra-ordinary travels and travails of the human heart.

I have nothing against Lost, but it doesn’t fit my needs for real TV (not to be confused with ‘reality TV’). I want humanity, and I don’t need constantly sex-driven plots with lots of skin thrown in, any more than I savor shows that completely ignore sex.

Raise your glasses for the ‘Freaks and Geeks’, ‘Joan of Arcadia’ and ‘Veronica Mars’. Savor what we have left – ‘The Shield’, ‘Ugly Betty’, ‘House’ and ‘Friday Night Lights’*. I may have to cut back on my vast social life in order to make it home on Fridays by 9:00 PM..

*Grey’s Anatomy gets close, but seems to be relying on the ‘soap’ numerator versus the ‘real plot’ denominator in my top-secret ratio determining whether a show is worth watching.